Cliques: Eight Steps to Help Your Child Survive the Social Jungle

Cliques has a twofold message: things are much worse in middle school than you think, and as a parent, there are specific steps you can and should take to make the situation better. The first claim is unnecessary--we all know that cruel stuff happens to kids in junior high school--but the authors go on to give advice about how to help your child survive.

The book addresses two different phenomena: bullying and cliques. The latter (those impenetrable social castes that admit and exclude children at whim) often employ "the fourth R--ridicule" to devastate the self-esteem of those who are "out." This tormenting of peers is not only random and cruel but also often criminal.

The book is divided into eight "steps," each a practical lesson, such as "Help Your Child Belong" and "Empower Your Victim." The sections end with a short, practical list of "Things You Can Do" (e.g., "Work on reducing the conflicts that disrupt your family") and "Things You Cannot Do" (e.g., "Make your child more popular"). The final step, "Lobby for Change," contains some practical advice on what you can do to make schools into kinder, gentler places. It is heartening to hear that programs set up and run by savvy, big-hearted kids have been some of the most effective in addressing the issues. --Richard Farr