Husbands Who Love Men

In "Husbands Who Love Men: Deceit, Disease and Despair," Aileen H. Atwood, RN, Ed.D., paints a chilling portrait of the ultimate male users -- gay men who marry straight women.

Their reasons are many. Some may be truly bisexual, deriving equal pleasure from sex with men and women, others seek to hide their homosexual orientation in order to advance in careers, and yet others may only come to the realization that they are gay after they have been married for many years.

But in every case, there's a woman being affected. Whatever it was that prompted a gay man's decision to marry, the revelation of his secret sex life is devastating to his wife. The man she trusted and loved failed to share one of the most important aspects of his life, one of the defining pieces of his identity. Not only that, because of his repeated sexual contacts with a high- risk population, he has exposed her -- without her knowledge -- to an extreme risk of contracting AIDS, the fatal disease that attacks the immune system. The woman, shaken by the lies and the callousness of his actions, questions her own femininity and often feels blind or stupid at not having figured out the truth by herself.

Atwood found little information on bisexuality when researching her book, and none of it focused on the profound effects gay husbands have on their wives and children. "Husbands Who Love Men" helps fill that void, taking the whole issue out of the closet.

In this emotional book, she examines why gay men marry women, why straight women would fall for gay men, why some men prefer sex with men, the impact of a gay husband's secret life on his wife and children, the danger of sexually transmitted diseases, and many other issues.

"This book was written primarily for women," Atwood says. "On one level, this is an emotional book , designed to offer aid, and perhaps even comfort, to wives who know that something is wrong in their marriages but are unable to understand what it is. ... Finally, this book is a summons to women who have already discovered that their lovers or husbands are homosexual and who need some help finding answers."

Finding out a husband is secretly gay can destroy a woman's marriage, dreams and self-image. It's a crushing psychological blow. Even worse, such men's deceit can put their wives unwittingly at risk of catching AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases. In "Husbands Who Love Men," Aileen Atwood, RN, Ed.D., pulls male bisexuality out of the closet. Through the case histories of women who survived, she looks at the motives of both parties in "heterogeneous" marriages and discusses this little-researched "taboo" with authority. "Husbands Who Love Men" is a wake-up call to every woman who thinks it can't happen to her.