Something: A novel. Pills, parties, poppers. Colorado kids. An adventure that starts with a laced burger and ends on a high school stage.

Gerald Jimenez, a 22-year-old burger cook with a loose understanding of the law, wants to beat the system with his hair-brained schemes—drug-laced burgers and pimping gigolos. Leonard Kowalski, a 17-year-old virgin, simply wants to get laid. The boys’ lives become intertwined when Leonard makes an accidental purchase from Gerald and finds himself with a throbbing protrusion and racing heart, and is alone in a classroom with an attractive, though difficult, girl. Afterward, Gerald needs his money and, more importantly, respect. Leonard, finding himself in a high-school love triangle, needs what Gerald sells. The two become like friends, though they can’t stand each other. Their “sort-of friendship” leads to a road trip to get back a girl and, ultimately, to save Leonard’s friend, Wallace, from gun-toting rednecks in Utah.