Artificial Maturity: Helping Kids Meet the Challenge of Becoming Authentic Adults

Artificial Maturity: Helping Kids Meet the Challenge of Becoming Authentic Adults, by Tim Elmore

What caused you to write the book Artificial Maturity?
As I concluded my research for the book, Generation iY, I began seeing so many students who were beginning well then not finishing in school, work, sports, and other areas. Adults assumed they were mature and ready for a task or commitment, but unfortunately, they were not. I compare it to fools gold. It looks real, but it's just an illusion.

What exactly is artificial maturity ?
Artificial Maturity is the result of two realities in our culture today:

• Kids are over-exposed to information far earlier than they are ready.
• Kids are under-exposed to real-life experiences far later than they re ready.

This over-exposure, under-exposure enables them to appear very smart, savvy or confident, but may lack emotional maturity, life skills or wisdom that comes in time.

What does authentic maturity look like?
Often, kids today develop with huge imbalances; they re mature in one area and immature in others. Authentic maturity occurs when a person grows in each area of their life:

• Physically
• Cognitively
• Emotionally
• Socially
• Spiritually

This means they manage the weight of three realities: autonomy, responsibility and information. When they experience autonomy, they re able to also handle the appropriate responsibility and information that come with it.

Describe the world that kids are living in today. Do the challenges override the opportunities?
A shift has taken place between early Generation Y and later Generation Y kids. Although born perhaps less than a decade apart, there are measurable differences:

Early Generation Y (Born in 1980s)
• Highly compassionate
• Technology is a tool
• Activists (They are passionate)
• Civic-minded
• Ambitious about future
• Accelerated growth

Generation iY (Born since 1990)
• Low empathy
• Technology is an appendage
• Slack-tivists (They are fashionate )
• Self-absorbed
• Ambiguous about future
• Postponed maturation

What are some key steps that need to be taken for artificial maturity to evolve into authentic maturity?
Adults must perform some balancing acts with kids, helping them balance autonomy and responsibility; information and accountability; screen time and face-time (in-person experiences); community service opportunities with self-service time. Two examples are:

1. We must be leaders who are both responsive and demanding. We must offer support but also enforce standards. I describe this type of leader as a velvet-covered brick: soft and supportive on the outside but strong and principle-centered on the inside. We must balance tough and tender leadership.
2. We must relay messages early and later in their childhood and adolescence:

Early Messages (First ten years)
• You are loved
• You are unique
• You have gifts
• You are safe
• You are valuable

Later Messages (Next ten years)
• Life is difficult
• You re not in control
• You re not that important
• You re going to die
• You re life is not about you

Do you still have hope for the iY generation?
Yes! I m not hopeless. I am optimistic. But with one caveat; they ll be great if we adults will re-think the way we parent, teach, coach, manage and lead these kids.

How does Artificial Maturity differ from other books?
This book offers practical ideas to develop authentic maturity in kids. I describe my previous book Generation iY as the diagnosis and Artificial Maturity as the prescription. I crowd-sourced 20,000 people who lead kids & asked: what are best ideas you ve seen to grow kids? Each chapter ends with a few of these real-world examples.

What is Growing Leaders the organization that you founded and currently lead?
Growing Leaders is a non-profit organization created to develop emerging leaders. My team and I provide public schools, state universities, civic organizations, and corporations with the tools they need to develop young leaders who can impact and transform society.