Dreams and Prayers of the Desert Beggar.: Childhoods Fruition. / Russ Pouliot

I'm a beggar before God. Every time my heart beats, I owe God infinity. God picked me up by the scruff of my neck and threw me down on this earth with two arms, two legs, everything works. "There ya go kid. Work it out." So I have. I'm grateful that he did. I'm grateful for the creature that sired me. A womb and a sperm donor, that's it, that's what I got for parents and I'm all the better for it. Throw in alcoholism, clinical depression, paranoia, apathy, lethargy, sexaholism, rageaholism, egotism, conceit, dishonesty, bigotry; That should just about do it. What amazes me is that I could create at all during this period, I guess I could not have created at all if I had not had all these miseries (blessings). Beauty of the world and humanity and the love of my wife healed me. Healing, forgiveness and catharsis where the self fullfilling engines I was blessed to have working for me from this long ago time of torment that God blessed me with. I was blessed to write it down, I was blessed that I could write it down, I am blessed to have this record of my, " - - - Evil, beat days all young men go through - - -," as Kerouac put it. Here it all is in poetry, a mess of haikus, some kick kickwrites. I don't believe I'll mess with it any more. I'm done. It's all out now, finished. I'm going on, got cool new manuscripts I'm working on. This all goes on to the future now. Grandkids, my son graduating, an angel wife, and my music (singing)! Time, I have time now to create in health, having been healed. Hope you buy it, hope you enjoy it. All the best. Ciao.
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