Promises, Promises: A Romp with Plenty of Dykes, a Unicorn, an Ogre, an Oracle, a Quest, a Princess, and True Love with a Happily Ever After
15.00
USD
Book Details
Author(s)L-J Baker
PublisherLethe Press
ISBN / ASIN1590213378
ISBN-139781590213377
Sales Rank2,221,975
MarketplaceUnited States 🇺🇸
Description
A talking pearl earring. A gleaming white unicorn. A flower from an ogre.
Sandy Blunt, witch, has big dreams but C-average magic skills. Her only noteworthy talent is for paying extravagant compliments to women. Trouble is, when she uses that gift, she unwittingly foretells the future for a pretty princess. The punishment for prophesying about one of royal blood is death. With the help of ill-assorted companions, including a self-proclaimed princess in disguise with a wild imagination, a self-absorbed member of the royal guard, and the not-so-average girl next door, Sandy has a year and a day to travel to far-flung places--encountering such dangerous creatures as a dragon who writes awful poetry, slovenly elves, and boarding house landladies--to collect the weird and magical items needed to turn her prophecies into promises and so evade the executioner.
Sandy Blunt, witch, has big dreams but C-average magic skills. Her only noteworthy talent is for paying extravagant compliments to women. Trouble is, when she uses that gift, she unwittingly foretells the future for a pretty princess. The punishment for prophesying about one of royal blood is death. With the help of ill-assorted companions, including a self-proclaimed princess in disguise with a wild imagination, a self-absorbed member of the royal guard, and the not-so-average girl next door, Sandy has a year and a day to travel to far-flung places--encountering such dangerous creatures as a dragon who writes awful poetry, slovenly elves, and boarding house landladies--to collect the weird and magical items needed to turn her prophecies into promises and so evade the executioner.


