Together Forever: Gay and Lesbian Couples Share Their Secrets for Lasting Happiness

Just because gay men and lesbians are denied the right to get married under the law does not mean that there have not been gay "marriages": committed, sustained, emotional and physical relationships. In Together Forever, journalist Eric Marcus interviews 40 gay and lesbian couples who have maintained decades-long relationships and presents us with a complex tapestry of love, desire, and friendship that is as stirring as it is heartwarming, as invigorating as it is moving. While Together Forever contains much of what you might expect--coming-out stories, meeting-cute stories, tales of horrific homophobic cruelty, and just-folks-at-home images--Marcus is an astute enough writer and interviewer that the individual tales are always surprising. He is also not a single-minded booster for idealized, perfect relationships. Many of the couples here talk about their hard times with one another as well as their struggles with work and family. A compelling theme running through the book is how sexuality shapes and informs long term relationships. Questions of fidelity, open relationships, and monogamy surface in these interviews, discussed with honesty and a rare understanding and compassion. Written with a incisive eye for detail and an ear for the quirky phase and insight, Together Forever is a welcomed addition to the ever-increasing wealth of materials on the complexity and courage of gay and lesbian relationships. --Michael Bronski