First time making resolutions – seems pointless, but am getting fat and no one loves self / don’t want to end up modern day, homosexual Bridget Jones.
• Diet. Will return and continue to fit into fantastic 28†waist skinny jeans until AT LEAST age 30. • Change job or go back to college. Will finally be in appreciated authoritative roll with options to develop and grow.
• Pay off BOTH credit cards. Will NOT be tempted by pay deposit now, pay rest later super cheap holidays.
• Stay single so as not to be distracted or misled from other ambitions for perfect, self-development centered year.
• Finish (Start) writing first children’s novel and all other lifelong ambitions.
• Enjoy life.
Anyway. New Years Eve. Friends will be here any minute. Still naked.
Jeremy.
Jeremy Banks would like to note that it is extremely important to pour a large glass of wine before reading. Jeremy Banks would also like to warn readers that this book may contain occasional alcoholism and copious amounts of roast dinner.