A Lullaby of Flies: A Memoir

I hated myself by the time I was six, because I was fat. I became bulimic at age fourteen- I had always used food to control my intense emotions, but as time passed, it became something else, something no one understood- not even myself. Meanwhile, what little structure there had been in my family was falling apart, and I ran away in an attempt to conserve my sanity. After years of living in tents, caves, staying with strangers, and periodically sleeping on my father's couch, I was admitted to a psychiatric hospital, only to be forcefully discharged due to failed insurance. Heartbroken, I was released raw and unprepared back into the world, once again alone. Adrift, I joined the Air Force in 2005 at age nineteen. My story is not how I overcame all of this, exactly; it's how I survived it. It's a social commentary on youth who fall through the cracks, on friendship, on women in the military, and how anyone- if they can somehow find the strength to just keep breathing- can open a new, brighter chapter in their lives. This is the very real story about how my non-life became a Life.