When the Past Is Present: Healing the Emotional Wounds that Sabotage our Relationships

In this book, psychotherapist David Richo explores how we replay the past in our present-day relationships—and how we can free ourselves from this destructive pattern. We all have a tendency to transfer potent feelings, needs, expectations, and beliefs from childhood or from former relationships onto the people in our daily lives, whether they are our intimate partners, friends, or acquaintances. When the Past Is Present  helps us to become more aware of the ways we slip into the past so that we can identify our emotional baggage and take steps to unpack it and put it where it belongs.


Drawing on decades of experience as a psychotherapist, Richo helps readers to:


   • Understand how the wounds of childhood become exposed in adult relationships—and why this is a gift
   • Identify and heal the emotional wounds we carry over from the past so that they won't sabotage present-day relationships
   • Recognize how strong attractions and aversions to people in the present can be signals of own own unfinished business
   • Use mindfulness to stay in the present moment and cultivate authentic intimacy

• Daring to Trust: Opening Ourselves to Real Love and Intimacy
• How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
• Couple Skills: Making Your Relationship Work
• The Five Things We Cannot Change: And the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them
• How to Be an Adult: A Handbook for Psychological and Spiritual Integration
• How to Be an Adult in Love: Letting Love in Safely and Showing It Recklessly
• I Love You But I Don't Trust You: The Complete Guide to Restoring Trust in Your Relationship
• The Courage to Trust: A Guide to Building Deep and Lasting Relationships
• Deal Breakers: When to Work On a Relationship and When to Walk Away
• The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships