I, Lucifer

Lucifer and “The Boss” preside in partnership over a wacky afterlife. Lucifer’s primary role is that of a librarian, assigning newcomers to a regimen appropriate to their deficiencies. He and the Boss are alert for signs of growing human rationality. Lucifer doesn’t greet everyone; some receive direct routing. When the Boss is overwhelmed the routing is immediate, which is why Mozart died at thirty-five. John Wayne and Will Shakespeare exchange views in Babe Ruth’s microbrewery—until Duke is cold-cocked by Maureen O’Hara. Why did Chuck Ponzi receive direct routing? And why is it that only Jerry Falwell grieves the absence of lust? Can Jesus’s advice be followed: for everyone’s safety keep John the Baptizer away from any source of water? And why was Saint John the Divine demoted to Jack the divine? Join Jesus’s winter solstice routine when he examines parthenogenesis. An epilogue from the future reflects progress.