Nude Dude: Limericks, 'Converbs' and Other Brainstorms

Are you worried that more and more American jobs are going to China, or that if the NRA has its way nuns will be carrying guns, or that when the earth keeps getting hotter we'll all have to go around naked, or that you won't get pie in the sky when you die? Well, relax. If our jobs keep going to China, we can all move to China; if we all have to go around naked, we'll get used to it; if nuns start carrying guns, the Pope will bear arms too. As far as not getting pie in the sky when you die, maybe you'll get pickles and rye. So stop worrying, for worrying is a bummer.

It's more fun laughing, unless you're griping, which can also be uplifting.

This collection has limericks, 'converbs,' more humor, and things to ponder.

Leon Schwartz has published two books of limericks, etc. entitled Limericks, 'Converbs,' and Utter Folly and Loose Goose, 'Converbs,' and Other Rib- Ticklers. (Worthy Shorts, 2010 & 2011), and has read his limericks at both the first and second annual Los Angeles Limerick Festivals, and, although he had moved to Maryland before the third festival in November 2012, his limericks were read and applauded there too. He was also invited to read them for Beatnik Day at the Secret Rose Theater in North Hollywood before leaving California, in spite of his arthritis and unpredictable grumpiness. He justified his appearance at a Beatnik Day event on the grounds that as a kid he got plenty of beatings. After the second Limerick Festival, a reviewer from the publication LA Weekly, Paul Bradley wrote the following on his November 15th LA weekly blog: "This is a limerick festival after all, and the gentleman, Prof. Leon Schwartz, is killing them softly with rhyme.... Schwartz was the opening act Friday night....How can you not have fun when someone like Prof. Schwartz, a decorated WWII veteran, can belt out some sublime smuttiness...?"

Prof. Schwartz was hurt by the reference to "smut," though he liked the word "sublime." But actually, far more of his limericks can be rated PG or R at the worst.