Philosophy for Cats

Philosophy for Cats is a collection of wit and wisdom from the greatest cat philosophers that ever skulked our planet. From renowned thinkers of the past such as Catfuscious and Cuddles Darwin to modern philosophers such as Miss Fluffy and Snowball, this little book is crammed to the tip of its whiskers with gems of knowledge. Whether you are a cat, a human or indeed a member of any other species, you will benefit greatly from reading the thoughts of Catkind’s most eminent intellectuals. So read on and prepare to be amazed and amused at this fascinating insight into the lives of cats.

Extracts:
The pessimistic cat sees the bowl of cream as being half empty. The optimistic cat sees the bowl of cream as being half full. The wise cat sees the bowl and eats the cream.
- M. T. D’Lemma, 1908

I overheard my human say, “You are what you eat”. This is very worrying, for today I’ve eaten three mice and four frogs.
- Anx Hiety, 2011

I meow therefore I am.
I sleep therefore I am happy.
I purr therefore I am adored.
- René Descats, 1666

Applying the principles of logic a cat can only be in one of two possible states – in or out. However, a third, transient state is believed to exist. This has been termed, ‘Sitting pensively on the doorstep until you eventually make up your mind.’
- Leo Nimoy, 1932

What I like doing best is Nothing. I can spend a huge amount of time doing Nothing without ever tiring of it. The best time for doing Nothing is when your humans are rushing about doing Everything and you just lie back comfortably, watching and listening but just not bothering.
- Miss Fluffy, 2001

There's no problem too big or too complicated that it can't be fixed by taking a long sleep and letting your human take care of it for you.
- Camelot, A.D. 1276

If cats could swim fish would soon lose that smug look from their faces.
- Tiddles Tummytickle, 2011

Cat Law of Inertia
A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some external force - such as the opening of a tin of tuna, or the quiet scurrying of a tasty mouse.