Gay Men's Friendships : Invincible Communities

Representations of the gay community have come a long way since the bitchy banter of The Boys in the Band. In Invincible Communities, Peter M. Nardi makes it clear how powerfully supportive and influential friends can be in the lives of gay men. "Over and over again," notes Nardi, "I hear and continue to be told a central narrative of gay men's lives is that of how important their friends are to them, how this 'rich network of friends' is like a family, how sex has been a dimension of their earlier friendships with some of their friends, and how, for some, their friends mean more and last longer than do their romantic relationships." Basing his study on 30 interviews and the results from a questionnaire survey of 161 gay men, Nardi explores the ways masculinity is organized and expressed in contemporary America. Interestingly, in discussing "Friendship as Kinship," Nardi challenges the gay commonplace that we create "families of choice" through our friendships with other gay people. Suggesting that the metaphor of friends-as-family is a "strongly American concept," an adaptation to a conservative political culture, he points out the "gay-bi boom" has revalorized the nuclear family unit, albeit with same-sex parents and often the involvement of interested third parties: donors, ex-partners, coparents. Part history, part sociology, Nardi's study will interest psychologists, activists, and students of gay culture.