Where Quirky Meets Menacing: an autobiography in collage

An autobiography in collage. Forty-five quirky true stories from the life of the artist written in collage format.
Excerpts from some of the stories: I grew up in the shadow of the Iron Curtain during the Cold War.
Every year my mother gets two turkeys and names one Thanksgiving and the other Christmas.
My mother would tell me to think pretty thoughts, so I would think about tulips.
If I wanted to get back at her for something I had to do it in a pre-meditated covert manner.
After dinner we would sit on the deck, drink scotch, smoke cigars, and throw our table scraps over the edge to attract the bears.
These lessons were usually prefaced with, "don't tell your mother."
Her scream probably woke up half the campground.
I didn't realize that she was a madam and her name was a play on her occupation.
I always thought they were stupid. Surely they knew the babies weren't real.

Winner Bronze Medal 2009 Independent Book Publishers Award - Essay/Creative Non-fiction
Finalist 2009 Indie Excellence Award - Art