A Toast to My Mother: an "autobiography"

A Toast to My Mother is a satirical take on author's childhood behind the Iron Curtain. The year is 1968 and Oleg Gold begins his journey through life inside his Soviet mama's belly where feedings are endless and buoyancy is of the most genteel character. Well, almost. Unless his student mama has failed to, yet again, prepare for her class in Communism 101. Facing the real world is no cupcakes either where this little Communist's dreams are crashed when Oleg is forced to participate in the most treasonous act of all - immigration to where the Capitalist Pigs roam (the degenerate West). Before setting foot in the land of milk and honey the family has to make it unscathed through the border town of Chop and then survive the daily carbo-loading while in beautiful Italy. At long last, the Gold clan arrives in Brooklyn, USA where according to a popular song of that day "your dreams were your ticket out." It is 1981, "The Blue Lagoon" still rolls in one neighborhood theater and Oleg is 11 years old. "Please, don't squeeze the Charmin!"