Evolution Can't Be True Because I Don't Like Bananas: My Ponderings on Mr. Darwin's Flawed Theory

Here again, I will be gracing another major subject with my irreproachable wisdom and my brain-flipping intelligence,in this 4,630 word book. I doubt that there is a single evolutionist who can match wits with me because I am a student of life and of nature. My own self-administered studies are far greater than those that can be offered by universities and schools (not to degrade the importance of them for most people) or by attaining educational degrees and credentials (also very important for the right people). I need none of these things personally because I have already attained an education on my own, that far exceeds those that would provide me an officially-recognized expertize on any of the subjects I address. No, it is rather my own students – those who follow my written dissertations and teachings, who supply me with the credentials of an expert. Now here we go, into those golden gates of my chapters, that will forever change your brain for the better. You will in fact become 'brain-flipped”, so brace yourself and delve into my words of infallible wisdom! I hereby grant you permission to proceed! TABLE OF CONTENTS CHAPTER 1 The Importance of Bananas and Monkeys Among Evolutionists CHAPTER 2 The Theory of Evolution Makes Money for Scientists CHAPTER 3 My Interview with Bigfoot (“I'm Not a Missing Link” He Says!) CHAPTER 4 If We're Animals We Shouldn't Have Morals In Conclusion **The History Behind these Comedy/Satire Books**: While my largest base of book titles are on health disorder subjects, I also have a significant number of business-related titles published, as well as many on Christian Bible theology. Before I began publishing in any of these serious genres, which I do feel are my most important ones, I tried my hand at comedy via online articles I wrote in years previous (I created a few short stories during this period as well). Having kept these comedy pieces I wrote, in saved files after taking them offline, I decided to revive them by publishing them in eBook and paperback form. I did have to tweak them and edit them a bit but I managed to give them all that Percy P. III flavor. Of course as real the writer of them (James M. Lowrance), I think they're pretty funny and relatives who I shared them with, confirmed this evaluation -- so I decided to offer them to the world. With them being so different from my serious subject books, I assigned a pen name to them as well, being “Percyvelle Pennington the Third”. He seems more like the guy who wrote them, than I do. Percy is a snide type guy and he is arrogant; traits that I hopefully never display in real life! He does make his points known in his memoirs but in strangely comical ways. A “cheerful heart is a good medicine” according to the Holy Bible, and “laughter is the best medicine” according to Reader's Digest. My thoughts were, that if I could take a few serious or controversial subjects via my compiled articles and create a little comedy from them that makes people smile or laugh, it would be something worth publishing. With the debates going on within these subjects, between people expressing the pros and cons of them, it is my hope that I can lighten the rhetoric a bit by injecting some humor into them. These booklets ARE NOT intended to offend anyone and if you'll notice, I make fun of everyone in them, via my alter writing personality -- Percy P. III. It is my hope that readers find the medicine of laughter and cheer within the pages of them, so that they can escape the stressors of life for just a little while!