Net Negotiations:: What Every Parent Should Know about Controlling a Child's Use of Technology

Parents of addicted children and adolescents are the number one people to call for help. In my clinical practice, I work with parents on what I call “Net Negotiations” or parenting training on how to deal with kids and technology. Parents are dealing with something that many of us have not had to deal with when we were growing up. Those of us at certain age did not have computers or technology to this extent when we were children. The Internet wasn’t always a household thing. So, many of us are learning how to parent in the digital age. What does growing up with technology mean? What are the consequences or concerns we should have when children go online at four or three?
I also work with parents on what to do with their child after turning 18, and legally considered an adult. It is often the case that parents have seen the problem develop for years but as a son or daughter reaches a certain age of responsibility, the extent of his or her technology addiction is very apparent.
Net Negotiations is for parents of children ages 2 to 18 and beyond. The book covers such issues as:
• Parents need a great deal of guidance on how to raise kids with technology. How young is too young to start them? Various resources suggest limiting all use of technology until a child is two or three, and even then, one hour a day may be the maximum limit.
• Early science on the impact of technology on the brain suggest that excessive use and multitasking creates attentional problems and distractibility.
• We know that too much use is bad and not just because it is excessive or compulsive, but Internet addiction in children and adolescents creates problems. Problems in social development, physical health, and ambition and goal setting.
• Like addiction to drugs and alcohol, the Internet offers children and adolescents a way to escape painful feelings or troubling situations. They sacrifice needed hours of sleep to spend time online and withdraw from family and friends to escape into a comfortable online world that they have created and shaped.
• Children who lack rewarding or nurturing relationships or who suffer from poor social and coping skills are at greater risk to developing inappropriate or excessive online habits.
• Socially, children learn to instant message friends rather than develop face-to-face relationships, which can impact their way of relating to peers.
Net Negotiations helps parents with a simple, step-by-step strategy to learn:
• How not to use technology as a babysitter.
• How children can learn responsible computing.
• How to stop the impact of addiction on your family (and your child’s Internet addiction).
• How to identify risk factors in your child.
• How to encourage your child to exercise and stay engaged in school activities.
• How to identify the early warning signs of technology addiction.
• How to find help if you think your son or daughter has a technology problem.