A Tale Told in Cats... and interpretive dance: Really, no cats are involved... (Tales from the Old Guy Book 1)

In the chaotic time of -Clears throat for excessive periods of time- there was only one man who could save humanity... and he failed miserably at it. But because we haven't the budget to hire some glorious actor like Morgan Freeman, or Hugh Jackman, instead we had to settle for this... what do you want from me? Leave me alone!